Awesome Tag

Posted On August 29, 2014By Will GoldsteinIn Miscellaneous, Ramblings

Born on the 5th of July: Part 16

Record 16: Torrance, CA, Tuesday, July 5th, 2011. Night. I’m not going to tell you that I like what I do. I do what I do because when I do it I don’t do it poorly. So what is IT? Let’s break IT down: (note: I’m using numbers instead of letters for arbitrary reasons that I don’t feel like explaining because I write for free and explaining arbitrary reasons defeats the arbitrariness of those reasons). 1. I have sex with old women. Not older women. OLD women. 2. I don’tRead More

Posted On July 17, 2014By Will GoldsteinIn Miscellaneous, Ramblings

Born on the 5th of July: Part 9

Record 9: Glendale, California, Friday July 5th, 2013. Day. For weeks Dax had planned his 4th of July celebration. It was to take place in his new home’s back yard, at approximately 2:00 p.m. He was expecting over 20 guests, mainly colleagues from the printing company he had begun working at a month prior, and whom he had gotten to know over beers and marijuana smoke 2 – 3 times a week. He had been accepted by the clique of nerds almost immediately, it seemed. There was no inquisition asRead More

Posted On July 9, 2014By Will GoldsteinIn Miscellaneous, Ramblings, Rants

Born on the 5th of July: Part 8

Record 8: North Hollywood, California, Saturday, July 5th, 2014. Day. Hey man, I’m gonna write you this letter real quick because I have to get back to the warehouse in a few minutes because my dad needs help restocking a buncha breakaway glass. We have to be really careful when we put it up, you know, because it breaks easily and I’ve broken so many of the props before and got grounded for it. That was shitty. My dad made me stay in my room too. He only let meRead More

Posted On June 14, 2014By Will GoldsteinIn Miscellaneous

Born on the 5th of July: Part 5

  Record 5: Venice, California, Sunday July 5th, 2009. Day. So like Reed and I got to the Whaler a few hours (yeah, fucking hours) before his mom even called us. She texted me earlier, which seems weird, but she always texts me when Reed doesn’t answer his phone or leaves it on silent. Her text said: TELL MY SON TO TEXT ME K? So I told Reed to text her a few hours later when he woke up. It was around 1:35 in the afternoon. I remember because IRead More

Posted On June 5, 2014By Will GoldsteinIn Miscellaneous

Born on the 5th of July: Part 4

  Record 4: Pasadena, Thursday, July 5th, 2014. Day. I’m at the Pie ‘n Burger again. I’m drinking coffee at the bar. I’m thinking about Shia LaBeouf. I’m thinking about how I really used to love Even Stevens when I was a kid. I was a kid before I was an unemployed 27-year-old vagabond-dude who still wears jeans that aren’t too-tight. Then I wonder what it’d be like to wear a brown paper bag on my head with a cool statement penned in Sharpie. I could be like new-Shia, circaRead More

Posted On May 28, 2014By Will GoldsteinIn Miscellaneous

Born on the 5th of July: Part 3

  Record 3: Scottsdale, Friday, July 5th, 2013. Day. I’m sitting on the leather in my family’s center room, which is made for living, as some say. My father, who wears his mustache thin and wire-like, is staring out of our smudged window, contemplating something that is now, I’m afraid, causing him to shake his head to and fro in a ‘this-will-just-not-do’ manner that makes me anxious. I ask him a question with words about his unusual new physicality. He rambles and putters with letters and such, and I think,Read More

Posted On May 20, 2014By Will GoldsteinIn Miscellaneous

Born on the 5th of July: Part 2

Continued from 5/19   Record 2: Koreatown, Los Angeles, Thursday, July 5th, 2010. Night. No one wants to get into a fight sober. No one. This leaves me with two options: 1. ask Hea Woo for a Jameson double and assume she’ll put it on my tab, which I’m hoping she’s lost track of, or 2. fight sober. I signal for Hea Woo. Catch her periphery. She cranes her neck just far enough left so as not to leave the eye line of her dead faced man of the hour,Read More
Hello, everyone. I’d like to take this time to formally introduce myself to you – yes, you – on the other side of my laptop. My name is Will, and for the sake of my attention span and your sanity, I will conclude any further introductory pretension here. There will be no need for punctilious handshakery or bro-huggery. Our time together will be brief, albeit rewarding, should you find yourself as keen on grammatically particular text and Facebook messages as I am. If you’re not, I implore you not toRead More