list Tag

No year in recent memory has brought with it as much turmoil and general fuckery as 2016. From the celebrity lives lost, to the spiraling of world events, to the dumpster fire that was the US presidential election, it seemed like this was the year that would never end. And of course it had to be a leap year too, extending our misery for an additional 24 hours. 2017 can’t get here soon enough. In these twilight days of this lemon year, there are a few things to look backRead More

Every holiday season brings something new, and this year brought for me some observations. This being my first holiday season an appetizer contributing adult, I noticed things I had never considered in my many years as nothing more than a young gift receiver.   1. Each day closer to Christmas and New Years everyone’s driving gets worse. Everyone is desperate to finish shopping and beginning to lose their minds from all of the contact with distant relatives.   2. After December 20th, don’t even try surviving the mall. If DecemberRead More

Making resolutions for the new year is easy: lose weight, read more, eat healthy, blah, blah, blah. Unfortunately, these life changing commitments are typically abandoned well before the second month of the year. Instead of setting yourself up for failure with vague resolutions and no plan of action, this can be the year that you actually follow through.   Instead of “lose weight” 1. Don’t drink during the week. Alcohol isn’t doing us any favors when it comes to our health. For most people, it’s pretty unrealistic to cut out alcoholRead More

For the past 15 Monday nights, I have been expanding my knowledge on human sexuality.  With my semester coming to a close, I can’t help but reflect on what I have learned.  Ladies and gentlemen, let’s talk about sex.   1.  You can blow a condom into a balloon. “Don’t miss class next week.  I guarantee you will do something in a classroom that you have never done before.”  My professor has a flair for the dramatic, but he wasn’t joking.  Have you ever walked in on your teacher withRead More

Times are tough, man. I get it. Jobs are few and far between, and what little money you have seems to buy less and less as the days progress. It’s not out of the question that you would look to the adult film industry to help supplement your fledgling or altogether nonexistent income. There is nothing wrong with that. You have to do what you have to do. And if sex is involved, you’re probably not going to get a lot of sympathy from me. But you also don’t reallyRead More

Every weekday morning, I turn on the news to hear voices.  It is unlikely that I will engage in active listening before I’ve had my first cup of coffee. However, hearing the weatherman’s warm voice and seeing the traffic reporter in full hair and makeup reminds me that there are other souls awake.  As a non-morning person, this daily routine inspires me to get up and stay up.  Sometimes I’ll drink my coffee and pause for a second to hear what my news anchor friends are blabbing about.  Last Monday, before 7am, they toldRead More

I am a guy who likes to watch porn every once in a while. And my neighbor has a pretty solid wireless network, so I’m able to enjoy near-limitless streaming of all my favorite videos. Sometimes I’m so enraptured by the technology and the fact that I can watch porn until the cows come home that I end up watching vaguely shameful things until the sun rises, because I live in a city where there are no cows, and as such am unable to discern when they even start theirRead More

1.  Make your bed. Good morning and congratulations!  You woke up again, and you only pressed snooze twice! Ever heard of the expression, “Messy bed, messy head?”  For me, this simple saying makes all the sense.  The mindless act of putting your bed together sets the tone for a productive, calm day.  It just does.  Prepare a fresh start to the day by respecting your space.  And floss your teeth while you’re at it.  People forget to do that.   2.  Smile at strangers. I once heard a wise manRead More

Next month I turn 27, which is definitely not an abnormal age during which to be single, but a lot of people in their late 20s are in serious relationships. Many of them are married and own homes and have created children (whereas I go months without getting laid and the most valuable thing I own is a five-year-old laptop computer). So now some people view it as curious that someone my age is single. They want to know why I still am. And why I have been for theRead More

Here’s a question worth asking: why does contemporary news come in list-form? It used to be we’d get the occasional, yearly ‘Top 10 Albums’, ‘Top 10 Movies’, ‘Top 10 Books’ lists, and so on. In recent years, though, the practice of utilizing lists became somewhat of a go-to platform for authors of popular culture. Lists ranking a year’s most entertaining television shows evolved into indexed accounts of where to find the most delicious nonfat lattes in southern California. If you were wondering why giraffes should be your favorite animal, BuzzfeedRead More

The other day while I was laying in bed with a bowl of coffee, my favorite KTLA news reporter said something that semi-grabbed my attention.  She said, “blah blah blah professional eater blah blah blah.”  Professional eater?  My eyes had been opened and it wasn’t the coffee this time.  If there was a job title like that out there in the open, what else was there?  As someone who is clearly looking for another job, I had to investigate further.  Listed below are ten of the least talked about jobs in theRead More

Well, fans of Writtalin, I’m back.  I know you’ve all missed me terribly over these past several months, but I assure you, there is an excellent reason for my absence.  I could blame work or my incessant travels, but there’s really only one acceptable response: I’ve been jamming out 24/7 to the amazing slew of new music 2014 has hurled my way. But Anthony, you ask.  Isn’t there new music all the time?  First of all, don’t interrupt me.  And second of all, yes, but 2014 still puts its olderRead More

A strange thing happened to me when I started working in marketing and advertising: I started to look at everything within the context of marketing and advertising. I wouldn’t say I’ve become obsessed with branding; it’s more like my eye for and appreciation of branding has bled from my work life into the rest of it, so that I can no longer discern the two. For the layman: a brand is a name or other feature that makes one product distinct from its competition. And a huge part of anyRead More

Unless you’re a trust-fund babe living in a coked-out fantasyland, you have a job.  According to the Bureau of Labor Statistics, 15.7 percent of us work in wholesale or retail trade.  In other words, 15.7 percent of the workforce doesn’t remember what a weekend feels like.  For some people, it’s the job they hope to have for years.  For the rest of us, it’s simply a job we work while keeping our eyes wide open for bigger and better possibilities.  While it seems like most of my friends have movedRead More

  College football will be back in one month, and along with all of the best people in the world, I am ecstatic! I went to Baylor and have a near and dear place in my heart for the Big XII. I am also a straight, human woman and have a near and dear place in my heart for exceptionally hot men (I’m talking to you Kliff). I now invite you to take a journey with me through the coaches of the Big XII from the uggos to the only footballRead More