Posted On March 23, 2014 By In Buzzworthy, The Scene

Note To Self: Don’t Carry A Bomb In My Rear End


The Malaysian flight isn’t the only big news in Asia. Recently, a man was passing through the security line at the Beijing airport. The line was a tad slow, so he started to complain. At first, it was stuff that we’ve all complained about. You know, things like how much security sucks and how it all feels like a waste of time. But this fine gentleman took it a step further. When he saw just how slow the security agents were operating, he asked one if he needed to “drop [his] pants as well.” The reason? “I have a bomb in my ass.” Some laughed, but the security agent didn’t see the humor. The man was immediately detained and given a full cavity search. Oh, and the ENTIRE AIRPORT WAS SHUTDOWN.

Aside from the apparent lack of common sense on the side of the agent, let’s examine why this might have happened. What if this was all a designed plan by the man to get a cavity search? Some are into that kind of thing. We shouldn’t judge him if he is (at most places you have to pay a lot for that, so why not get it for free?). Or maybe it was a euphemism for having to relieve his bowels? I’m sure I have used the same diction in my own times of bodily peril. Whatever the reason, we may never know. But this I do know….

Don’t say the word bomb around airport employees. It’s not worth the impeding bodily search, plus the inconveniencing of thousands of travelers. Don’t even listen to the song, “You Dropped a Bomb on Me,” in public. Too bad, because I love The Gap Band. #80s.

Tags : , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Brian Wray is a writer for Writtalin. A self-proclaimed hipster who makes his home in San Diego, he recently escaped LA after working in production and casting for the past 2 years. His interests are tennis, recording music, and more tennis. Follow his various works at And Twitter him @BrianWrayMedia