Posted On December 11, 2014 By In Advice For Women, Girlzone

Why You Should Stop Being So Hard on Yourself


Remember when you placed second in that declamation contest back in sixth grade? That supporting role you played during a school event? Or that masterpiece you worked hard day and night for but wasn’t published? You know you won’t let yourself forget all those so-called mediocrities, so you just sulk in your nook and cringe your way through the day trying to convince yourself you’ll never be good enough for anything, for anyone.

You get so shell-shocked with all that has been going inside your brain, thinking about every possible thing that could go wrong. Why is it that no matter how hard I try and try and try, nothing ever seems to work for me? Why is it that whatever I do, I feel like I will never be enough? I’m absolutely certain that everyone has, one way or another, asked these questions to themselves – whether it’s flunking a test for which you studied your butt off, or placing second in a contest you absolutely practiced for like it was the only thing you know in your entire life, or maybe simply being lost and unsure of what makes your heart happy.


Accept that some things just aren’t meant for you, and that there will be better things you will discover soon. What people fail to realize is that it’s OK to fail, to lose, to not get what you want, to not be what you desire to be. People need to know that only under these circumstances will you be able to realize that you are not defined by some award you get at some competition, by another person in a relationship you’re not even sure of, by a career you may even lose at some point. Do not let earthly acquisitions define you. A prize is just a prize; you may have all the bragging rights in the world but more than that, a sense of fulfillment isn’t really guaranteed.


Go easy on yourself, let loose. We all have our fair share of good and bad days. There are mornings when you decide to sing in the shower despite having to endure cold baths, and there are also those mornings when you just don’t want to wake up, peel out of bed and face a whole day of pure nothingness. It’s totally fine not having anything to say, not being in the mood to write, not being in the zone for a game of basketball. You don’t need to push yourself to do something you don’t feel good about. Sometimes, a person just needs a day off from all the work and all the pressure being put on one’s achy back.


Let go of all the things that are making your heavy heart sink. You failed that test? Let it go, study harder, reap better results. You don’t have to burden yourself with things that are already far beyond your control. What’s done is done and the only thing that’s left to do is be better. Letting yourself stroll in the past is as useless as killing your precious time on a rocking chair, it may give you something to do but it will surely get you nowhere, so just shrug off all the bad things. That way, you’ll be helping your heart unload all the unnecessary weight that’s keeping you from being a better version of yourself.


So stop being so hard on yourself.
Accept, let loose, let go and carpe the hell out of your diem.

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Athena is a writer for Writtalin from Manila, Philippines. Graduated with a degree on International Studies major in European Studies, Athena works as a copywriter by day and your resident book sniffer at night. A (self proclaimed) old soul, she has this crazy affinity for turtles, sunflowers, teabags, long walks, and hot baths. An adrenaline junkie in search of new heights, you may find her taking on a new sport or just capturing the scene by the sidelines.