This could take a while. For starters, I’m pieced together by chocolate and sappy love songs, but you’re going to appreciate the choice you made. Ever since I knew what the opposite sex was and what it entailed, I have been attracted to every species of male. I won’t lie to you, I am a flirt. My personality is bubbly and I am always smiling. When you see me talking to some other guy, don’t get nervous. I am with you for a reason. If I wanted him, I wouldRead More

If you didn’t go to summer camp as a kid then you might not understand that camp is the best thing ever.  As a counselor at a resident camp for three summers, I am here to tell you to stop hunting for a summer job and start hunting for a summer camp!  It’s not the easiest job ever, but it’s definitely one of the most fun. The Good Playing all day. Being in nature and teaching kids about it. Showing kids how to unplug and have fun away from TV,Read More

Guess what? It’s almost May and as of May 1st, we are 42 days away from the greatest sports spectacle in the world, the FIFA World Cup. I understand that soccer may not be everyone’s cup of tea here in the United States but it is undeniably the most popular sport in the world, viewed and played in more countries than any other. It is also my favorite sport. Recently, even in the US, the successes of the Men’s and Women’s National teams have taken the sport’s popularity to aRead More

I firmly believe that when it comes to dating, texting is the actual devil. It is the demise of dozens of relationships and one text can be a game changer for countless others. One text can keep someone up all night in a ball of anxiety, and one vibration of a phone can send someone into a nervous tizzy. If it were up to me, texting would be strictly for use between friends. And not the, “Oh my god, I’m so not into him at all,” friends, I mean actualRead More

“One can’t. But Toucan.”   “Suga’ suga’ how you get so fly?”   “Damn girl, you SO Foxy”     “Hold still, I’m gonna give you Macaque”   “Gurl gimme that Octopussy”   “I wanna hump you so bad right now.”   “You make me SO horny!”  Read More

Wedding season is about to be here! New York Spring Bridal Week has presented some of the most beautiful gowns on the runway. Designers focused on airy, delicate gowns that any bride would swoon over. Sleeves were a main focus along with illusion looks that had tattoo style lace. Vera Wang, Reem Acra, and Monique Lhuiller showed illusion necklines, sleeves, and back details. Monique Lhuiller even presented a mint green tulle ball gown that easily became my favorite. Her inspiration this year was “My Ethereal Daydream.”She drew inspiration from American portraitRead More

Eyes open. Shit.  I’m alive. What now? Can’t I just lay here until I die?  I wish I could do that.  Maybe I could do that? What should I do?  I’m hungry.  Lie back down? Wait. Dog.  Piss.  Let’s go asshole. Unsteady legs underneath me towards the front door. The first shot shoots up my neck. The coldness of the fear envelopes my world. Not again. Wish I was a dog.  Tail fucking wagging.  He isn’t scared. You’re stupid.  Relax. Breathe. Neighbor door opens.  Not going out there.  Wait dog. Read More

I’ve recently found myself, for lack of a better hashtag…#singleasfuck. Not only that but hey, I’m a girl so I have to deal with hormones, PMS and all that fun stuff. The only guy who calls my house is Randy from Chase Visa. Just kidding, I don’t have a house phone. Anyways, drunk grocery shopping led me to find the ultimate lover: a pack of Double Stuffed Oreos. Why are they better than a man you might ask? Well girls, listen up! 1. Oreos NEVER disappoint Oreo after Oreo IRead More

Well, Class of 2014, it’s that time. Only a few more weeks and you’ll be taking selfies in your cap and gown, preparing for post-grad madness, and ignoring all of the shitty speakers at your college graduation. You’ve probably already reached the point at which all of the adults in your life transform into total a-holes, repeatedly asking you about your future plans (Who f*cking knows. You’re graduating–Isn’t that good enough?!) and I’m sure you’ve already read 10 different lists suggesting 100s of things you need to do in orderRead More

Tara Miele’s Thinspiration movie premiering this Saturday on Lifetime, Starving in Suburbia, follows a young dancer as she is slowly sucked into the world of anorexia and an online community run by the devastatingly mysterious ButterflyAna. Some of you may be wondering what thinspiration is (if you don’t know about it, consider yourself lucky!). The literal definition is “Photographs or other material intended to provide inspiration for anorexia nervosa as a lifestyle choice.” What this really means is there are thousands of images, websites, hashtags, twitter handles all dedicated to supporting and promotingRead More

Trend on the Rise: Children Climbing into Claw Crane Games Earlier this week a little girl climbed into a claw machine and began passing out toys to others. However, this is the second time within a week that this has happened. Coincidence? I think not. I don’t blame these kids. Those games are so frustrating. So, if I were small enough to crawl in and grab my own toys, why not? That’s a game within itself. The fun challenge is to find your way back out. But apparently this isn’tRead More

Getting dumped is something I have become well acquainted with during the past couple of years.  I like to blame it on my stint teaching English in Thailand, where an ex-pat lifestyle boasted an environment unsuitable for fostering skills to sustain a relationship and which resulted in a lot of strangers tongues in my mouth on island parties.  When I returned to the U.S. I went out with a lot of men that I was incompatible with, who I catered to, and who were only interesting after a whiskey sour or five.  I didn’t knowRead More